Monday, June 4, 2007

Blank Page

It stares at me. Wide and unblinking. The emptiness of it yawns—no, it laughs. In the large colorless expanse, the solid white takes on numerous shades and subtleties. In the center, it’s bright, clinically depressing white. Over on the side, it’s creamy, rich, delicious vanilla white. On the bottom right, it’s somber, light gray ash. In the corners there are even hints of blackness.

As I study it, it seems to expand…to flood from one horizon to the next. There are moving, living swirls in the shades of white, dancing and tumbling. It flows like an ocean wave, the blinding white tumbling over the softer cotton white, lolling from left to right and right to left. Writhing and turning, it churns, like a muted monochromatic kaleidoscope.

The longer I stare, the more colors there are. Flecks of red appear in the vast white expanse. If I try to find them, they wink out—to be replaced by blue dashes, irregularly scatted. Next are waves of black-white-gray static, falling merrily from the top corner to the far bottom one.

It is outer space inverted…an infinite plain of blinding white dotted with meager specs of color. What could be just beyond reach…new stars, new planets…that’s never been seen before? They are buried in the vastness, waiting to be discovered.

Continuing to stare, my eyes lose focus, and the mind wanders. The pallid sheen glitters like newly fallen snow over a frozen landscape, holding captive all the wonders of a mythical forest floor beneath its icy grasp. Beneath the rigid blanket could be a tribe of fairies, huddled next to a mushroom, waiting for the cold to withdraw.

I blink.

The cursor at the top of the page is winking, slowly, at me. I’ve still not written a word.

2 comments:

John M said...

Thanks for the comment over at Doom. If you have an evening like the one you describe again, perhaps you'd be in the mood to contemplate the weird pseudo-randomness of Rule 30.

If you're not on deadline, then you can afford to wait. My mentors advise not trying to force it. Read stuff by your peers, and do walking, gardening, cooking, whatever. Your muse will come when not called. (hope that helps!)

Nevanna said...

John,

I've been reading Doom for at least a year or so. Just never commented. :)

Luckily for me, my income is not dependent on writing...lol... As much as I enjoy it, I don't seem to do it enough. My latest idea is to just write--something, anything--and see if it's just a habit thing.